The Mesopotamian Mind

Remember when you first learned about Mesopotamia? Cuneiform? Gilgamesh? Ziggurats?

Me neither!

Was it junior high? High school? College? I'm not sure I ever actually learned about Mesopotamia. I definitely don't remember learning anything about a guy named Hammurabi. And I could not point out Ur on a map.

But it's a new generation. Hello, Core Curriculum. Just a month into 1st Grade, my son brought home this study guide...

Yep. He had a test on Mesopotamia.

Mesopotamia!

Now, I've been pretty positive so far about Core Curriculum. I like the idea that if we were to one day move to another state, Little Dude wouldn't miss a beat in school. I like the math that he's been doing (basic algebra right now). And I like the amount of time spent on reading, spelling, and writing.

But seriously? A test on Mesopotamia? I can't even pronounce "ziggurats" and he's supposed to know what it is? Shouldn't 1st Grade Social Studies be spent learning something more general instead of delving into a subject that college students spend an entire semester studying?

So last week, I found myself having to make a decision... whether to just help my kid memorize the answers to get through the test or to actually make sure he understood the subject. Hmm...

On one hand, I've survived this long without any academic knowledge of Mesopotamia. Unless Little Dude plans on completing the $800 question in the Mesopotamia category on Jeopardy, I'm sure he'll be fine with just memorizing. But on the other hand, with the way Core Curriculum is structured, what if this is the foundation for future lessons on Mesopotamia or other ancient civilizations? What if he gets into 3rd Grade and regrets having just memorized the answers because he now has to truly delve into the subject? What if he has to take The History of Ancient Mesopotamia in college and is behind all his peers... because mom just let him memorize the answers?

With nightmarish visions of my child's future failure in my mind, I sat down and starting quizzing him. Luckily, he knew most of the answers AND how to pronounce them. In fact, he even corrected my pronunciation a couple times.

Apparently I was worried for nothing. He knew the subject. We even Googled some Core Curriculum lesson plans on Mesopotamia and had fun looking at the pictures and PowerPoint slides as Little Dude taught me about Mesopotamia. He even told me the story of Gilgamesh.

Crisis averted!

This time.

Hopefully next time I'm facing a memorization vs. understanding choice, I'll remember this moment. The moment I realized my kid actually learns stuff in school. The moment I realized that memorization is also an important tool to learn and that my kid doesn't have to be an expert in every subject. The moment I realized that my title as the "Crazy Mom" at school is pretty secure because I tend to over think everything.



EPILOGUE: Little Dude went on to ace the Mesopotamia test. He didn't have to spell ziggurats or Euphrates. It was multiple choice. :-) He is now studying the Scientific Method. And Crazy Mom over here can't wait delve into that subject!!!

1st Day of 1st Grade!

Leaving for school... super excited!

Today was Little Dude's FIRST DAY OF 1ST GRADE!!!

He was super excited this morning as we loaded up his backpack and several steamer trunks full of all his new school supplies. He couldn't wait to start the day!

When we met his new teacher earlier this week, she gave each child a special card to open on Wednesday night at bedtime. It had a little poem about the first day of school and some "magical" star confetti to sprinkle under the child's pillow to help them sleep.

It worked! He woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed... er, bushy headed actually. The cowlicks are crazy!

Anyhow, he was cheerful and looking forward to starting a new year at school!

Then... we actually got to school.

During our long 3-minute car ride, my peppy boy had quieted. We parked and I, as the designated family Sherpa, loaded up my arms and back with a few hundred pounds of school supplies and led the way to Little Dude's classroom. Little Dude glumly sat down at his desk while I unloaded the supplies. He looked sadder by the minute.

Once we got to school... not so excited.

Little Dude was bummed that his BFF was not going to be in the same class this year. We found that little piece of information out at "Meet the Teacher" night, and it didn't really hit Little Dude until today. Big Dude thought it might be a good thing that Little Dude and his BFF are separated for class time. What? Like school is about learning and not about socializing? Big Dude can sometimes be a little old-fashioned that way. But at least they would have recess together.

The good news was that Little Dude found out he has several other friends in his class this year, AND he gets to sit next to the prettiest, nicest girl in his class. That did help ease the pain of being separated from his BFF.

Side Note: I'm pretty sure Little Dude has a crush in the prettiest, nicest girl in the class, because when she arrived at "Meet the Teacher," the monkey boy suddenly stopped running around and acted all quiet and shy. It took him a while to finally muster up enough courage to say hi to her. How else do I know he has a crush on her? Because on the car ride home, he said that he was going to have to break up with his preschool girlfriend who is going to another school (long-distance relationships can be so tough... especially when you're too young to own a cell phone!) and that he wanted the prettiest, nicest girl in his class to be his new girlfriend. I simply reminded the little Casanova that he's in 1st Grade now and he needs to make sure he keeps his lips to himself this year.

Little Dude's teacher came over to greet him, and he perked up when he got to give her a bottle of Diet Dr. Pepper, her favorite drink. He was also happy to show her the bounty of supplies we had brought. (It's never to early to teach your children the value of sucking up kindness. Then he politely asked if he could go to the playground to find his friends.

So I said goodbye to my little 1st-grader and hoped he had a great first day. And thankfully he did! When we all got home tonight, Little Dude said he had a pretty good day after all. They sorted supplies. He met a few new friends. He played with some old friends. And he didn't have any homework, as he said, "Because it's only the first day!" Ah... let the school year begin!!!

Too Cool for Back to School

Ready to learn!

It's that time of year when parents everywhere rejoice... when we dream of routines, early bed times, and quiet hours while children are studying. BACK TO SCHOOL TIME!

Luckily, Little Dude is still young enough that he also looks forward to going back to school. He's excited to see his friends again and have his art class again and play on the playground again. Hey, the kid has priorities!

We kicked off our Back-to-School week with the all-important "Meet the Teacher" Night. We were really looking forward to finding out which class Little Dude would be in and who his teacher would be. 

I don't know how other parents feel, but "Meet the Teacher" Night is a little intense. You're meeting the person who is going to be teaching and influencing your child for the next 10 months. You want to make sure they are not going to instill some unsavory philosophy on your child or teach them something that contradicts the ethical standards you have at home. I truly doubt he would end up with a teacher that uses science class to teach him how to grow his own marijuana farm or a teacher that tells him lying is ok as long as he gets away with it. But you never know.

This year, Little Dude's teacher is not only brand new to the school, but it's also her second year of teaching overall. The good thing about having a teacher fresh out of school is that she's probably still quite enthusiastic and filled with new ideas and excitement.

This new teacher, Mrs. W., has obviously seen just enough action in her first year of teaching, that she was ready to answer any questions we parents threw at her. In fact, she already had a pre-defensive strategy prepared in the information packets she handed out. She vowed to answer emails, post lesson plans online, write daily notes about each child's progress and behavior, and fight for peace, justice and the American way.

I listened as other parents asked her whether our collective brain trust would be learning algebra this year. Yes, they will... along with some geometry. I listened as other parents asked her whether she would have something prepared for the child geniuses who are advanced readers. Yes, there will be an accelerated reading group. A parent would hurl a question and ping! she'd deflect it with her impenetrable bracelets. Another parent would ask her about her qualifications and pow! she'd banish any concerns with her golden lasso.

Little Dude's new teacher.

The thing is, not only were we in there sizing up the teacher, but she was probably judging us at the same time too. And first impressions can be crucial. Mrs. W can probably already guess which parents are going to fill up her email box every week, and which parents she'll probably never see again until the end of the year. She can probably guess which parents will hover over their children as they complete their homework, and which parents will probably never sign a single sheet all year.

Since I'm pretty sure the school office knows me as "The Crazy Mom," I tried to hold the crazy back. No reason to reveal my overbearing mother tendencies when all the other parents were peppering her with the same questions I would have asked. No reason to add to the madness while everyone was trying to convince her of how uniquely genius their child is. Besides... I'd rather have my child shock and amaze her with his highly exceptional intelligence in class. BAM! She'll probably hand the kid a diploma by the end of the week!

A little note here: Every parent I've ever met believes their child is the smartest, most talented and most beautiful child to ever walk the face of the earth. And they should... because it would be a crappy childhood if your parents were not the leaders of your cheering squad! 

Hubby had his own strategy to impress the new teacher. He name dropped. Big time!

Upon hearing that the teacher graduated from my own alma mater, which is a Christian university. Hubby name dropped with the biggest name you can possibly drop... God! I don't know how exactly he did it because I was still trying to be inconspicuous like some sort of parent ninja (I strike when you least expect it). But somehow he dropped that we are active church members. He hoped it helped make a good impressions.

Because later when I drop the crazy mom bomb on her... at least she'll know she can talk to our mutual friend (God) about me and He'll understand. Amen!

The Kiss of Guilt

Last week I was about to step into a meeting at work when my cell phone rang. The caller ID caused my stomach to clench... It was the school.

Calls from school are not usually a good thing. It usually means either you're child is sick or hurt or your child did something terrible. This call was the former.

"[Little Dude] fell on the basketball court and bit into his lip. His top lip looks pretty bad and it looks like his bottom lip is hurt too. There's a lot of swelling and blood so it's hard to tell how bad it is. Do you want to come check him out?"

Now, if you ever think moms sometimes seem distracted, it's because we are busy doing a hundred calculations in our brains. As soon as the school receptionist asked if I wanted to come down there, my head was filled with all the variables...

He busts his lips all the time and it may not be too bad, but on the other hand he could have bitten all the way through his lip and that is bad, but if I go down there he'll have to come home with me because he won't want me to leave him especially after the trauma of biting his lips, but if it's not really that bad then he doesn't need to have me upset him emotionally by showing up and leaving, but  then again he may need me to rush him to urgent care, but he used to fall and hit bust his lips all the time at preschool and he always recovered and if I rush to school the first time he gets hurt and it's not truly serious then I might besetting a precedence that I'll always come to swoop in and rescue him, but he needs to learn to be a big boy and cope when he's not seriously hurt, but I really want to skip this meeting and go grab my baby boy and hug him and make sure he's ok, and maybe this is one of those times when he really needs mommy to come get him and hang out with him the rest of the day.

The debate in my head took all of 3 seconds before I said, "Put a bag of ice on his lips for about 20 minutes and then call me to tell me how they look."

Then I took my cell phone into the meeting, explained I may have to leave early and sat there thinking about my kid's bloody lips the whole time: It's before lunch and even if he stays at school he may need me to bring him something soft to eat. Maybe I can at least bring him a yogurt or a milkshake. Yeah, a milkshake would be good. The cold might be good for his mouth right now. Why hasn't the school called yet? Why didn't I just go down there? Maybe I should have gone down there. Now I'm not just the crazy mom who constantly calls the office to find out every detail for everything that's going on and bugs them about whether he's learning at the right level, but I'm also one of those moms who doesn't care when her kid is sick or hurt. What must they think of me? I'm definitely not winning any Mother of the Year awards for this. Why haven't they called me yet? Which urgent care is closest to the school?

After about 40 minutes of this, I excused myself from the meeting and called the school to find out his status.

"One of the teachers used to be a nurse and she took care of him and got him calmed down. The swelling stopped and he went back to class."

Ah, relief and the justifying knowledge that I DID make the right decision.

Of course, I spent the rest of the day imagining my kid sitting in class with tears and ice packs and blood down the front of his shirt. When my husband picked him up, he brought another flood of relief by telling me it wasn't bad at all. Just some scrapes. He was even well enough to kiss us goodnight later.

Ah, motherhood.

Talk about an imagination running wild!

Just a little bragging...

OK, so no funny story today... this is just a mom bragging on her kid. Her 5-year-old child. After a hard Wednesday night of memorizing a ton of verses (John 3:14-16 and some stuff somewhere in the book of Joshua), my child sat in the back seat while I drove him home. It was pretty quiet, until...



Obviously, that's not the back seat of my car. In the car he said everything perfectly and added the Pledge of Allegiance on for good measure. So I rewarded him like any good mother would... by making him do the whole thing again so I could videotape it!

They are learning some serious stuff in Kindergarten!

Going GQ in Kindergarten

Yesterday, the school sent a note home saying that today would be "Spring Picture Dress Up Day." It went on to explain... oh, whatever, I'll just cut and paste it so you can read it:

Tomorrow is Spring Picture Day… 

Students may “dress up” for their pictures.  This means that they may

wear whatever they deem appropriate for school pictures.  We call it a

“dress up” instead of a “dress down” but we mean the same thing…  Dress

your best for the occassion, uniforms not required but completely ok!

Little Dude took this to heart.

This morning, I picked out a nice blue button down shirt and khaki slacks for him. But it was not good enough for my little GQ man. Oh, no! Little Dude decided a three-piece vest outfit would be perfect.

You can't see it in the first picture, but his tie matches the little fake pocket square in the little fake pocket on his vest.

Now that's some rockin' confidence!

My Kid, the Fighter

"Hi, I'm calling to let you know that [Little Dude] was in a fight at school today."

Little Dude's teacher rarely calls us. She usually communicates via notes or email. But yesterday at 3:30pm I got that special call.

The teacher believed he was simply defending himself, which is what she told the principal. However, the school rules don't allow hitting for any reason so the boys ended up in the principal's office. (Little Dude also had to clip down from orange to purple, but he worked his way back up to green.) She said this wasn't the first offense for the other kid involved and there would be consequences.

She also told me that she was worried about Little Dude because at the end of the day he still had a red mark on the back of his neck and because she was sure he was pretty shocked by the whole matter. "He didn't even cry! I was expecting him to cry, but he didn't!"

She was obligated to ask us to talk to Little Dude about finding a teacher instead of using his fists to settle matters. But she already knows (and agrees... though she can't officially say so) what we have taught our son.

See, we've had a mini-run-in once before where a kid picked on Little Dude (as the youngest in his class, he's an easy target). After telling the teacher, the kid didn't stop so Little Dude hit him. We've taught our boy to walk away first, tell a teacher second, and if it still doesn't stop, then he can use alternative methods.

We may not be perfect parents, but at least our kid isn't going to be bullied.

During dinner, I asked Little Dude what happened at school and he gave me the entire story, names and all (teachers can't give names). He, Adam* and John* were playing together, and suddenly John wouldn't let Little Dude and Adam off the "ship."

"Ship?" I asked, sure he was talking about the jungle gym.

"Yeah, that's what we called it. The 'ship.'"

Anyhow... John began hitting Adam. Little Dude went to help his friend. "John was hurting Adam and I didn't want him to be hurt."

"Was there a teacher nearby?" I asked.

He shrugged his shoulders, "I didn't see anyone." (I'm not sure how hard he actually looked.)

The boys all ended up in a dog pile. As soon as the commotion began, one of the male teachers pried the boys apart.

How do you get after a kid for coming to his friend's defense?

Yes, we did the right thing and told Little Dude that next time he needs to find a teacher first. We also told him that he should probably stay away from John. But we didn't punish him.

To tell the truth, we're proud of our boy. It's one thing to defend yourself, but it takes guts to defend someone else. And my boy did exactly that.

Plus, I also got to hear from the teacher about how my son is a leader in his class. "He is friends with everyone. He doesn't pick favorites or leave anyone out. He's the first one to help anyone out. If someone on the other side of the classroom drops their pencil, he races over to pick it up for them. All the kids like him."

That's a boy a mother can be proud of!


*Names, as always, are changed to protect both the innocent and guilty.

Kindergarten Casanova

So last week, Little Dude managed to come home with green smileys three days in a row. We thought we have finally overcome the bad behavior issues and were looking forward to happier colors of the rainbow.

But then Friday happened...

When I got home Friday evening, Daddy and Little Dude were waiting in the living room.

"Your son came home with purple today," Daddy announced. Then he turned to my son, "Tell Mommy why."

"Um... I kissed a girl and I hit my friend."

My child's school life sounded like a bad soap opera.

Hubby interjected, "Not at the same time."

Luckily, years of experience with interviewing people for their product testimonies to use on infomercials has given me the skills needed to interrogate, I mean, question my child.

*Names are screened to protect the guilty party.

"Tell me what happened."

"Um, I kissed a girl on accident and then I hit my friend"

"Who was the girl?"

"Jessica. She sits by me."

"Why did you kiss her?"

"It was an accident. I didn't mean to."

"What happened that made you kiss her?"

"She was asking me the name of a boy and I, um, was whispering 'Geovanni' to her and our noses were, um, touching and I forgot and I accidentally kissed her." He finished the line with the world's cutest shy-smile ever leaving me to wonder how accidental it truly was.

"And did she tell the teacher?"

"No."

"Did the teacher see it happen?"

"Yes."

"Was Jessica embarrassed that you kissed her?"

"I think so."

During the entire inquisition, my husband and I were both trying not to smile or laugh. It's wasn't easy.

"So tell me why you hit your friend."

"He hit me too."

"Where were you when this happened?"

"We were in the reading area and I was bopping him on the head like this," he said as he proceeded to curl his little fist and bop himself on the head. "And then, then he got mad and hit me back."

"And then what happened?"

"And then we went to the Principal's office."

"So you both got into trouble?"

"Yeah. He hit  me."

"But you hit him first."

So Little Dude is not only learning about letters, numbers, colors, and shapes in Kindergarten. He is also learning to keep his hands and his lips to himself.

Who knows what lessons he'll be learning this week!

Curse of the Rainbow, Part 2

So after a weekend of Behavior Boot Camp, Little Dude was ready to listen to his teacher and be a model of good behavior. We expected him to start earning some higher rainbow colors... or at least stay on green.

So Monday, when he came home with a purple, we were shocked. Seriously, purple? And another note from the teacher explaining that Little Dude is a very friendly child and tends to talk to his friends when they're supposed to be working.

Yes, that pretty much sounds like him.

So that evening, Little Dude wrote an apology letter to his teacher:

*Names have been blurred out to protect the innocent and guilty!

Little Dude decided exactly what he wanted to say in the letter and I helped him spell everything out. But, yes, that is his own handwriting. AND his own apology.

The next morning when I walked him to his class, I met another mother who said her son has been bringing home purples and even a pink! She admitted she called the teacher up and argued that her son could not have possibly deserved a pink because he is always so well-behaved.

It's nice to know I'm not alone on the crazy, defensive mom train.

That afternoon, Little Dude came home with... green! He stayed on green all day. The next day, he came home with green again! This time he actually got up to yellow, but then went back down to green.

I asked him if anyone has made it to red yet. "No."

"Has anyone made it to orange."

"One person did."

"Who was it?"

"I don't know. It wasn't me."

We're just glad to see that his behavior is finally improving!

Curse of the Rainbow, Part 1

So Little Dude started Kindergarten and the world rejoiced. What teacher would not want a completely brilliant child like him in their class? He knows his alphabet sounds, is able to write all his letters, can count to 100 (and to 10 in Spanish), and is starting to read. Yes... I'm bragging because my child is a freaking awesome genius! (Seriously, all mothers should think that about their child. It's our job!)

But Kindergarten has some differences from Pre-K. For one thing, there are a lot more rules. And being the start of the year, the rules are enforced a little more strictly. The teacher tracks each child's behavior on a rainbow chart. They all start with their names on green and they can move up or down depending on how well they behave. Red is reserved for only the most astoundingly well-behaved child. Purple is for the child who tends to tune out the teacher. And they even added pink below purple, which means, uh oh, time to talk to the teacher!

Our child has always been the model of good behavior, so we were positive he was going to come back with red, or at least orange or yellow on his first day.

But that wasn't the case. He came home with blue. OK, no problem, we thought, it's just the first day and he's adjusting. We had high hopes for the next day.

He came home with purple. Purple! The offensively violet smiley face (as if!) came with a note attached saying that Little Dude was having trouble listening to the teacher, but she was sure that once he adjusted to the new class, that he would be much better.

I've already learned that Little Dude doesn't want to talk about school after he gets home. Instead, he usually talks about it during the morning drive to school. So I was shocked the next morning when Little Dude said, "I'm not ready for Kindergarten."

"Who said that?"

"The teacher."

"What happened?"

"When I went down to purple, I cried and the teacher said maybe I'm not ready for Kindergarten."

What?!? I had to get to the bottom of this. So being the mother of a child genius that I am, I emailed the teacher and told her what my honest-as-Abe-Lincoln child said and that I was hoping for a misunderstanding.

She called me.

Now, I know that she has 30 other students and at least 30 other parents to contend with. So getting a call from the teacher during the lunch break on the 3rd day of school is like getting a call from the Pope.

It was all a big misunderstanding. Thank goodness! But she could understand how Jacob could have thought she said he wasn't ready. She explained they are focused on getting ready for 1st Grade, and she tells them that they need to learn these things in order to be ready for the next grade level. And I know my child... he definitely reads between the lines. She also explained that she is much tougher at the beginning of the year and that blue is not actually a "bad color," but a warning.

She then told me that it's especially hard to get after Little Dude when he's just so charming. She said, "One of the things the kids all need to learn is how to settle down after activity." That morning, the kids were running around the classroom for half an hour matching colors and shapes. When it was time to return to their seats and settle down, she asked the kids to be quite. They were pretty noisy so she told them that the next student to talk would "clip down" to a lower color. All the kids were quiet... except mine. He started singing. Yes, singing!

She told him that he was supposed to stop talking or else he'll clip down. He replied, "But I'm not talking. I'm singing. It's different."

She couldn't clip him down for such valid reasoning. Instead, she modified her orders to "no talking and no singing."

After our wonderful conversation, I felt so much better and was looking forward to seeing her at back-to-school BBQ that night.

Little Dude and I heading back to school that night for some fun and pulled pork. He was less interested in the food and more interested in the fun. He was ran around like a wild child: not listening to me, not listening to anyone. Holy smoke stack! The child that I had just hours earlier defended like a courtroom lawyer, just proved that he really isn't the world's most well-behaved child. He hogged the ball while playing basketball. He ran to the opposite side of the field when I called him over. He ignored his teacher when she said hi. He stood on a desk. Yes! Stood on a desk. Basically, he behaved like a spoiled rock star!

Wow. I cannot even express the level of embarrassment I felt. I know kids will embarrass their parents from time to time, but I was not ready for this. This was bad. Fall on your face and accidentally expose yourself to the entire world bad. That's pretty much how I felt.

So last weekend, we had Behavior Boot Camp. It's a very prestigious academy where only the most qualified children (meaning worst behaving child geniuses) get in. In fact, only one child has ever made the cut. Little Dude relearned how to say please and thank you. Little Dude relearned how to be polite. Little Dude relearned how to listen the first time when asked.

We're hoping the boot camp will help whip Little Dude back into the amazingly well-behaved child we know he is. Stay tuned...

First Day of Kindergarten!

Today is my son's first day of Kindergarten! He is super excited. Can't you tell?

Daddy surprised us by meeting us in the school parking lot. Little Dude was definitely "too cool for school" as he walked to his class like a pro. When we got to his classroom and found his desk, he even pretended like he was already bored! Of course, he couldn't stop smiling!

I managed to get through the day without any tears. OK, maybe I was a little moody... but I was honestly too excited for him to cry about my baby growing up. That will come later.

Fun and exciting things are going to happen this year!